r/funny • u/PhoenixPhenomenonX • 14h ago

Where’s the PRNDL

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credits : cherubg1rl

29.1k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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10.6k

u/NotBillderz 14h ago

"Why is there a rope here?"

4.7k

u/Raytech555 13h ago

So the driver can hang himself

1.9k

u/TheMinister 11h ago

You have a lot of belief in 3 inches being useful.

2.3k

u/Efficient-Bet-5051 11h ago

That's what she said.

360

u/No_Mony_1185 8h ago

3" going 100mph can do a lot of damage

178

u/ANONYMOUSEJR 7h ago

That's how he replied.

12

u/johnnybiggles 4h ago

Not the mini burnout I was expecting.

2

u/spariant4 4h ago

bravo brother

1

u/Infamous-Leading-770 1h ago

😂🤣👏👏👏

72

u/Bannon9k 5h ago

Dude, you reminded me of when the crash test dummies came to visit us in school in second grade in the late 80s... The first one shows up in costume saying that he's waiting for his friend, then they played the crashing sounds on a tape cassette player, then the second one came busting through the door saying "it's amazing where you can park doing 80"

And that kids is the only thing I remember from car safety education in school.

6

u/xenobit_pendragon 3h ago

Oh man, that reminds me of the friendly police officer who would visit the classroom once a year to remind us that drugs are bad mmkay and hand out D.A.R.E. stickers for our rad trapper keepers.

2

u/TheGallifreyan 6h ago

Is damage what you're going for?

8

u/Tobazz 7h ago

You think that mini can hit 100mph? 🤣

12

u/oh_hai_brian 6h ago

You’ve never seen the Italian Job…

6

u/Tobazz 6h ago

That’s old enough where they were still kinda cool though 🤣

1

u/Vanilla_Gorilluh 4h ago

They sure can haul gold fast.

6

u/NuncioBitis 6h ago

Sure... if you shoot it out of a cannon

2

u/EarBubbly9421 3h ago

In a free fall, yes.

1

u/Efficient-Bet-5051 4h ago

Mini is a racecar

3

u/Junior-Ad-2207 5h ago

He informed her thusly

3

u/lavatorylovemachine 5h ago

So what you’re saying is if he just gets a running start before sliding it in then his 3 inches could potentially feel like she got hit by a 7?

9

u/[deleted] 7h ago

[deleted]

-6

u/No-Quarter-2539 7h ago

BWAAAAHHHAAAAAHAAHAHAHA!!!OMG THAT IS SO FUNNY!!!🙄

0

u/AMTravelsAlone 7h ago

Username checks out.

2

u/rwalker920 3h ago

The only way I can bottom out in my wife is if I get a running start

2

u/PlainSpader 2h ago

Some of the greatest men in history did allot less with less than 3”.

2

u/UDPviper 50m ago

The Flash has a small wang.

1

u/Capital_Critic 3h ago

HEY-OH!!! 🤣😆😅

8

u/Suggett123 8h ago

The 80s called: You've won a valuable prize for perfect execution of their catchphrase

7

u/BizzyM 9h ago

GOT EM!!

3

u/Anxious_Camp_2160 6h ago

She definitely never said that, more like "what am I supposed to do with that!".

5

u/No_Establishment8642 8h ago

That's what he said. She just rolled her eyes.

1

u/det4410 6h ago

bing bong

1

u/Capital_Critic 3h ago

HEY-OH!!! 🤣😆😅

413

u/KugelFanger 10h ago

I'll have you know i made 2 kids with that amount of inches.

52

u/N3rd1x 8h ago

So one and a half inch a pop?

5

u/KugelFanger 6h ago

Nah, you always need some reserve just in case she wants more rope 😏

4

u/SexyMonad 5h ago

Depends on if you include my dates with Palmela Handerson.

2

u/lavatorylovemachine 5h ago

Cost him one ball each

2

u/happy_idiot_boy 1h ago

So one and a half inch a pop?

Harsh way to find out mom cheated twice😂

6

u/UsedDragon 8h ago

Hey, even a short turkey baster can still help make a lovely Thanksgiving bird...just needs more pumps.

3

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

Right... It's not about the size of the tools but the way you use it 😂

3

u/tfyousay2me 8h ago

Bet they are short af

1

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

You can not imagine the potency my inches have.

2

u/SoggyMorningTacos 8h ago

You mean like one of them is 2 inches tall and the other one is 1 inch or are they both 1.5 inches tall

2

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

The power per inch in bigger than that if you know how to use those inches properly

2

u/zestyclose_match1966 8h ago

Are they 3” tall?

1

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

No, i alwayse keep one inch in reserve just in case my wife want "more rope"

1

u/JustYourNeighbor 6h ago

You are a nice lady.

1

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

Why thankyou 😏

1

u/Sasiches_and_mash 5h ago

That's what she told you

2

u/KugelFanger 4h ago

I made that to easy for you guys 😂😂

1

u/Grimdark-Waterbender 4h ago

You shouldn’t have (nevermind the state of the world), you need to do your part in removing small dick genes from the gene pool.

1

u/KugelFanger 4h ago

Carrying a python around all day gives you a bad back, you wanna raise a generation of bad backs?

At the end of the day we are all thee pump chumps anyway, big and small.

1

u/Grimdark-Waterbender 4h ago

Yes , I’d happily trade back issues for basic functionality.

2

u/KugelFanger 3h ago

I'm not sure if you are making a joke right now, but i did 😂😂 if you really think a big dick is all that, you clearly don't have one.

1

u/Grimdark-Waterbender 2h ago

Can’t say I do, I mean I already have chronic back pain but if it was for a good reason…

1

u/KugelFanger 1h ago

Had it once, that and painted a lot because i had so much blood rushing to my dick. medically irresponsible the docter told me, so i cut a huge chunk off. I want it back but the docter wont give it back apparently it's in a museum now where people can admire BIG DICK 😂😂

1

u/Graylian 3h ago

Get a paternity test... Sorry friend

2

u/KugelFanger 3h ago

No need, they look identical to me 😂😂. I am just good at using my tools.

1

u/FizyIzzy 2h ago

Does anyone want to tell this guy, or should I?

1

u/KugelFanger 1h ago

Let the "little" guy feel good about himself, why you need to burst people dreams.

1

u/Snoo49601 1h ago

That’s only because you THINK the kids are YOURS ! 😝

1

u/KugelFanger 1h ago

she told me mine was perfect, the big ones hurt

1

u/Snoo49601 48m ago

Great ! We will have That chiseled on your Tombstone ! 😆

-3

u/Exotic-Champion9617 9h ago

get a D N A /

9

u/KugelFanger 9h ago

😂😂, don't need to. They are undeniably mine.

13

u/MaterialDetective197 8h ago

Compared sizes did ya?

4

u/Snaw_Wee_ 8h ago

Brilliant

2

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

Fucking... 😂😂 God damnit. Here have a like 😂😂😂

-2

u/sloth_jones 7h ago edited 5h ago

Number of inches, or amount of dick would be the proper way to say this. Number is for when you can count it, amount is for unquantified things. Amount of semen used to make two kids, number of ounces of semen used to make two kids is another example.

Edit: new Reddit is so lame, I can’t even try to teach someone something without getting downvoted. If you downvoted this comment I hope you stub the same toe every day for a month straight.

2

u/Tricky_Mix2449 6h ago

People always confuse less and fewer. It doesn't take less semen even if you have fewer sperm. As long as that one winner is in the batch.

2

u/sloth_jones 5h ago

That’s another one yeah, the number and amount is easier to remember imo so it becomes one I try to teach.

1

u/KugelFanger 5h ago

I'm not native English, as you can tell.

3

u/sloth_jones 5h ago

No worries! I couldn’t tell, but I’m not trying to do anything more than help. So many native speakers don’t know the difference between these words either. I was just raised in a house with an English teacher, constantly being corrected is why I know

1

u/KugelFanger 4h ago

All good bro.

1

u/Tricky_Mix2449 4h ago

I always close with:

Please forgive me 🙏.

166

u/sadonly001 10h ago

My wife has assured me repeatedly that 3 inches is plenty

51

u/dontfollowmeimlost02 10h ago

3 inches is actually quite large.😉

14

u/edfitz83 6h ago

Mine is 3 inches, but it smells like a foot.

5

u/Malkelvi 8h ago

Do not hurt the cylinder.

2

u/_Wyrm_ 6h ago

Hospital.

1

u/Malkelvi 6h ago

Mashed bananas.

20

u/Dan3103 8h ago

As big as 3 penises in fact.

3

u/Fuzzylojak 8h ago

When measured from the floor to the tip of the penis

2

u/spaceraverdk 6h ago

If it's diameter.. 🤫

1

u/SuperRo0t 6h ago

Yep 👍

1

u/Left_Bathroom_3803 6h ago

That’s three inches in diameter. Wait that still isnt very good 😌

1

u/HotelOne 6h ago

Yuuge!

1

u/Sasiches_and_mash 5h ago

Like, this big:

🫸…....................................................... 🫷

1

u/Impossible_Ad_7367 5h ago

Aw, shucks. Thanks.

3

u/superdelegates 6h ago

Look, /u/sadonly001, nobody likes a show off. Isn’t it enough that you have a wife? Do you have to go rubbing your huge penis in people’s faces too?!

1

u/PositionAggressive69 5h ago

3 inches of bolt, yes, 3 inches of rope, not so much

1

u/BoomerKaren666 4h ago

My friends wife told him she wanted 12 inches and he told her he couldn't give her 12 inches but he could give her 3 inches 4 times.

-3

u/vinniemin 9h ago

And that’s why she’s always at the neighbors for the extra 5”

49

u/KamiKazic 11h ago edited 10h ago

Any rope master can make 3 inches work

2

u/DOULKONIS 9h ago

Just have to wet it and stick it in the freezer for a bit

1

u/marvinrabbit 7h ago

I can make a sheet bend but I can't do a trucker's hitch.

1

u/OnlyGuestsMusic 6h ago

Motion in the ocean.

3

u/MX1K 11h ago

It looks a lot like your seatbelt, perhaps you get more of it if you pull it?

3

u/Middle-Classless 10h ago

3 inches at 100mph on the other hand.

3

u/30HAT 8h ago

Don't ever let her tell you 3 inches ain't enough champ.

3

u/StrangerAlways 8h ago

3 inches is a lot.

3

u/noeagle77 7h ago

3 inches is plenty of rope. In fact, it’s a perfectly average amount of rope and there’s nothing to be ashamed about with 3 inches… of rope.

2

u/cochese25 10h ago

A real 3 inches or 3 man inches?

2

u/NetworkSingularity 10h ago

3 inches? That is clearly more than 3 inches. That’s at least 8 inches if not more. How dare you, sir, how dare you say that’s 3 inches in front of my wife

2

u/Present_Cash5830 9h ago

It's not about the length but what you can do with it. At least that's what my wife tells me. 😕

1

u/Explorer-7622 4h ago

It IS true. The first 2-3" is where women feel the most and where the g spot is.

1

u/Present_Cash5830 4h ago

Does that come after E? 🤔

2

u/Gnarlyfest 8h ago

I'm told it's all about the girth.

2

u/maniBchef 8h ago

Trump believes the same.

2

u/Playpolly 6h ago

Pringles

1

u/TheMinister 5h ago

I love Ron White

2

u/N3Chaos 6h ago

My children hinge their whole lives on 3 inches

2

u/DownvotedForThinking 5h ago

I can be hung with 3 inches…

2

u/jcrivas86 4h ago

It's not about the size, but about how you use it.

2

u/xXDeadops257Xx 4h ago

3 inches is enough to choke on

1

u/amanuensisninja 10h ago

Maybe in width?

2

u/muffinpizza 9h ago

Don't worry, we measure from the wheels.

1

u/amanuensisninja 8h ago

Aw, lug nuts.

1

u/WayTooMuchHyzer 9h ago

3 inches at 90 mph still hurts like hell

1

u/PerplexGG 8h ago

Got a lot of practice

1

u/Many-Role-4271 8h ago

It’s their life

1

u/Basic-Pangolin553 8h ago

Hung doesn't have to mean well hung

1

u/Shadowpriest 7h ago

It's not the length it's how you use it.

1

u/Redsoxdragon 7h ago

Three inches is pretty average. More than average. Personally i think 3" is pretty big..... huge even!

1

u/Lardzor 7h ago

> You have a lot of belief in 3 inches being useful.

That's what she said.

1

u/KILA-x-L3GEND 7h ago

Hey if a can make it feel like my blood pressure is being taken with 2in I think they got this!

1

u/notatechnicianyo 6h ago

Looks like 6 inches to me! 😎

1

u/TheHollowed_Knight 6h ago

So did my x wife 🤏

1

u/NextDoctorWho12 5h ago

How dare you! I was told it was plenty!!!

1

u/gerber411420 5h ago

Thats what she said. 

1

u/Agreeable_Sky4645 4h ago

Hey 3 inch quite big.

1

u/WildCat5400 4h ago

Every 1/4” counts

1

u/Capital_Critic 3h ago

HEY-OH!! 🤣😆😅

1

u/OddSpend23 3h ago

Title of your sextape

1

u/Wallstwannabe27 1h ago

Name checks out

1

u/ACcbe1986 1m ago

Ouch!

My pride...

1

u/3-Inch-Hog 5h ago

My mom always said 3 inches is plenty

1

u/NoRonNo-Youcant 11h ago

Kinky shit

1

u/MKvsDCU 10h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

1

u/Babu_the_Ocelot 10h ago

It's so the steering wheel don't whiff off while you driving.

1

u/jeanpaulsarde 8h ago

And even for that purpose it fails, it's too short

1

u/Tobazz 7h ago

A rope to hang yourself, and a giant speedometer to tell you EXACTLY how slow you are 🤣 love minis

1

u/polocinkyketaminky 4h ago

i mean, no prndl?! get me outta here...fast! i don't want to live in a world where cars don't have prndl.

1

u/gigashadowwolf 2h ago

Was John Cooper mentioned in the Epstein files or something?

-5

u/lIDezIl 11h ago

Man you are so funny.